Meet My Spokesmodel (Unpaid Endorsement)
What you're looking at here are actual cam pics of the guy who broke into our cabin three years ago. He's on the porch, crawling in through the unlocked window. He stole a few trinkets here and there, but his real target was the tool shed. The local police knew who he was, but they didn't think these pics would be any good as evidence. However, I think I might be able to put them to use in promoting my books. As in, "You don't need to break into my home to get your copy of CRYBABY LANE! You can come see me on October 7, at the Eat Local, Read Local Festival & Book Sale at the Cascades Library in Sterling, Virginia."
Of course, if the gent wants compensation, he can just come forward and identify himself officially. He needs to return the chainsaw and candles, though. Apparently he was hitting cabins for stuff he could sell at his mother-in-law's weekly yard sale. She must be so proud.